David Cronenberg Presents: “Robert Pattinson Reads Awkward Pronouncements About The Future”

by evanmcmurry

About halfway into a super-stylish, highly-aestheticized movie preview last night, I thought to myself, “This dialogue is sententious and terrible. It’s oddly on the nose, as if the characters had had thirty minutes to collect and condense every one of their lines, yet it’s entirely comprised of that vague intellectual babblespeak that sounds portentous but expresses nothing. [Sample line: “They’re protesting the future!”] Who in God’s name actually talks like this, let alone writes like it?” Then I realized what I was watching.

I once wrote an entire paper on the quick cold clang of Don Delillo’s dialogue, which often sounds like an urgent discussion about Derrida between two pieces of IKEA furniture. Needless to say, it doesn’t sound any better coming out of Robert Pattinson’s mouth.