A Flea in the Fur of the Beast

“Death, fire, and burglary make all men equals.” —Dickens

Tag: breitbart

The Market Works!

by evanmcmurry

More in-depth reporting from the conservative blogosphere:

The bloggers involved, none of whom regularly cover Eastern European politics, say they were pitched by a public relations firm to write the stories, but that they weren’t compensated for them, unlike bloggers who wrote in support of the Malaysian government.

You don’t hear the it’s-cool-because-I-did-it-for-free excuse coming from the right too often. Question from the back: if they weren’t doing it for the money…?

If Liberals Get Their Way, We’ll All Be Fucking Walruses Soon

by evanmcmurry

Class, which of the following two things do you think is true about our present world:

1) A cabal of liberal machinators is sitting in their headquarters in a skyscraper in Los Angeles, pulling literal levers that control the content of pop culture, for the express purpose of making bestiality legal, acceptable, and mainstream, as embodied in this Skittles ad starring a woman making out with a walrus.

or 2) Skittles markets to stoners, and walrus=WHOA.

If you picked 2, no staff writer position at Breitbart.com for you. John Nolte, probably still tired from writing the review of whatever movie he watched instead of The Dark Knight Rises, warns:

If you don’t think there’s an agenda behind this, you haven’t been paying attention the last 40 years. And if you don’t think that there are those who hold the levers of power in our popular culture that would like to remove the stigma from bestiality, you don’t understand the depths of sexual depravity the human animal is capable of.

I used to laugh at loud at the term “slippery slope.”

Then I grew up.

But I am at least old enough to remember when our culture wanted to protect a woman’s dignity, not degrade women under the guise of “liberation” and “equality.”

You know he’s serious, because his intern he copied and pasted the definition of “bestiality” from Merriam-Webster.com. That’s called research. Now, class, do you think the inclusion of the word “animal” in the above paragraph was intentional, and if so, how does it complicate Nolte’s argument?

National Review Writer Totally Onto Obama’s Plot To Destroy Suburbs, Which Would Totally Suck

by evanmcmurry

This is what The Vetting and Agenda 21-ism and all the rest read like when they get a haircut and put on a tie:

President Obama is not a fan of America’s suburbs. Indeed, he intends to abolish them.  With suburban voters set to be the swing constituency of the 2012 election, the administration’s plans for this segment of the electorate deserve scrutiny. Obama is a longtime supporter of “regionalism,” the idea that the suburbs should be folded into the cities, merging schools, housing, transportation, and above all taxation. To this end, the president has already put programs in place designed to push the country toward a sweeping social transformation in a possible second term. The goal: income equalization via a massive redistribution of suburban tax money to the cities.

The community organizers who trained him in the mid-1980s blamed the plight of cities on taxpayer “flight” to suburbia. Beginning in the mid-1990s, Obama’s mentors at the Gamaliel Foundation (a community-organizing network Obama helped found) formally dedicated their efforts to the budding fight against suburban “sprawl.” From his positions on the boards of a couple of left-leaning Chicago foundations, Obama channeled substantial financial support to these efforts. On entering politics, he served as a dedicated ally of his mentors’ anti-suburban activism.

Obama’s plans to undercut the political and economic independence of America’s suburbs reach back decades…Kruglik and his close allies, David Rusk and Myron Orfield, intellectual leaders of the “anti-sprawl” movement, have been quietly working with the Obama administration for years on an ambitious program of social reform…The Obama administration, stocked with “regionalist” appointees, has been advancing this ambitious plan quietly for the past four years. [all emphasis mine]

Notice scare quotes around “sprawl,” as if it’s some term liberals invented, like “artisanal” or “African American.” But more to the point, it’s not enough for Kurtz to disagree with Obama’s policies; every single thing’s gotta be plot with these guys. Obama’s “regionalism” goes back decades! (Breitbart is no doubt hard at work searching YouTube for a clip of Obama hugging an urban planner in 1989.) Everybody is “quietly” working—the word is used twice—as if these wonks were toiling at night with the lights off in a room in Washington, D.C., behind a storefront reading “Nothing To See Here, Inc.”

Thank God Kurtz is tracking their every step, or they might get away with…mixed use development? I’m not entirely sure what Kurtz’s problem is, except that he thinks environmentalism is a cover for socialism, which I guess works sort of like hiding a thin endorsement of upper-class self-segregation behind a loose bag of insinuation. But the National Review and cohorts can only get away with using Obama-fear as a bright light for so long; at this point I’m having trouble understanding how Obama found time to conceive and nurture every conspiracy that he’s now supposedly realizing as president.

Apropos of nothing, that’s Kurtz up above. That’s not a photo I dug up to make him look ridiculous, that’s the one he voluntarily supplied the National Review. That’s the EXACT FACE customers at my old restaurant used to make when they asked for ketchup for their steak.

Breitbart.com Reviewed Whatever Movie They Watched Instead Of The Dark Knight Rises

by evanmcmurry

If you haven’t read Breitbart.com’s review of The Dark Knight Rises, well…don’t do so immediately, or even today, but perhaps the next time a houseguest leaves a bottle of Malort on your counter. Here are the hits:

Batman is lost — a warrior without a war who sacrificed everything for a city that in peacetime dismisses those that make peacetime possible. Now smug and soft, Gotham is going about the business of letting down its guard — a weakness that always invites aggression.

Aggression has already arrived in the form of Bane (Thomas Hardy), a hulk of a man burning with resentment against a society whose only provocation is being prosperous, generous, welcoming, and content — instead of miserable like him. In Gotham’s sewers, Bane recruits those like himself — the insecure thumbsuckers raging with a sense of entitlement, desperate to justify their own laziness and failure and to flaunt a false sense of superiority through oppression, violence, terror, and ultimately, total and complete destruction.

They’re orphans, dude. You must have been tweeting during that part.

Uncharacteristically, Alfred (The Mighty Michael Caine) has lost some of his perspective over the years. He’s America’s surrogate parent of our wounded warriors and only (and understandably) worried about his child’s happiness and well being. In a world where evil is real, though, touching and noble intentions such as Alfred’s only get in the way of a greater good that frequently requires unspeakable sacrifice.

Plus he’s British. Think they’re so big, with the Olympics. They’re not the boss of us!

As expected, “Dark Knight Rises” is a love letter to Gotham City: its flawed but ultimately decent people, its industry and generosity — all of which are by-products of liberty, free markets, and capitalism. In other words, just as “The Dark Knight” was a touching tribute to an embattled George W. Bush who chose to be seen as a villain in order to be the hero, “Rises” is a love letter to an imperfect America that in the end always does the right thing.

And Nolan loves the American people — the wealthy producers who more often than not trickle down their hard-earned winnings, the workaday folks who keep our world turning, a financial system worth saving because it benefits us all, and those everyday warriors who offer their lives for a greater good with every punch of the clock.

While all of Hollywood embraces nihilism wrapped in irony, Nolan moves us with an inexpressibly touching faith in humanity. While all of Hollywood embraces CGI, the shaky-cam, and hyper-editing, Nolan sets his story in the real world and allows us to see what’s going on. And as all of Hollywood embraces hollow, artless, left-wing tripe, Nolan delivers crowd-pleasing, thematically-driven classical art that ennobles the human spirit — and while doing so, breaks box office records.  

There is, unbelievably, more. SEK has a good takedown of all of this, but here he really gets to the crux of the problem:

Conservatives aren’t accustomed to considering cultural artifacts with the seriousness they merit, and so on the rare occasion they want to claim ideological kinship with one, they have no idea how.

Also: The Daily Caller treats the leftist first half like an editing mistake. And ThinkProgress shows how to do ideological reviews of films, if you must. Plus, mine.